The Future We Hoped For
In this last year, I've mentioned in conversation with a few individuals that I had hoped by this time in my life, I'd be Jean-Luc Picard—leading a crew in a mission of exploration and discovery. Watching that character as a kid was inspiring, and to this day, his example is my North Star of what mission and leadership should look like. Picard was an important individual making a difference. I'm also fortunate enough to have been raised in an environment where I could dream about the possibilities of what I could accomplish as an adult. I believed in larger-than-life heroes who accomplish great endeavors. I still do.
And yet, there's a gap between my hopes and current realities. I am grateful for what I have and who I've become- but sometimes I ask myself what kid Jordan would think about where I am today, and I think he'd be slightly disappointed. I feel this when I've reviewed my checklist at the end of the day. "Really, this is how I spend my days?"
I think most people can relate to this in some way.
The distance between hope and reality is frustrating.
As I reflect more, I'm also mindful that others around me likely live with the pain of unrealized hopes. Most of us are trying our best and haven't arrived at the destinations we set out for. When I hear frustration in the voice of another human being, empathy can help translate what I hear and recognize that they're struggling with unrealized hopes.
But I am learning and constantly reminding myself that frustration is not failure; it's learning*. The seeds of hope grow from having some exposure to sunlight, but they must push through the gritty, earthy reality of life. That's hard work, and hard work is not just something worth celebrating; it's the very essence of progress. The kid version of you might not immediately appreciate all of your hard work, but that work has rewarded you in ways that your younger self didn’t anticipate.
Frustration can also be a reminder that we still have a vision and hope for our lives! You have enough self-respect to not settle for less, which is way better than having an aimless outlook for the future. Wanting to see something good come to pass is much better than not believing in the possibilities of progress.
So, cut yourself some slack. Keep walking towards your hopes. Hopes matter, and they make you a better person for having them. Remember that you're further along than you're giving yourself credit. Don't quit, and keep moving forward.
Thanks for reading friend!
P.S. I got the photo of me on the Enterprise from https://trekkieart.com/
*The idea of Frustration as learning is fleshed out in a chapter in Dr. Becky Kennedy’s book, “Good Inside” . There are so many valuable insights on parenting and leadership. I highly recommend!